Breathing Well

Posted on 29th September 2008 in Health Related, massage related

Correct healthy breathing often called deep breathing and also called diaphragmatic breathing. Breathing in general is not often done properly. Too many people breathe from their chests only, which is not correct or healthy. When breathing, your goal should be to fill all of your lungs, not only the top of them. Shallow breathing can increase stress and anxiety, which over time can have adverse effects on one’s general health. Learning to do diaphragmatic breathing can help turn that around.
As it can take some concentration, begin somewhere you won’t have to think about anything else, at home alone perhaps or shut the door to your office and lay on the floor with a pillow. Do this: lay on your back on a bed or a couch, somewhere comfortable where you don’t have to engage your muscles to prop yourself into any position. The key is to make sure your muscles are not engaged so that you can fully enjoy the effects of relaxing into breathing and not become distracted. At first place one or both of your hands on your belly, not high, right around your belly button. Expel all of the air out of you lungs. Then slowly breathe in trying to “fill” you stomach with air. It takes concentration; often your chest will start to “fill” up first. If that happens refocus and either start over or try to fill your lower lungs again. It’s something you have to work at, so don’t stress about it not being perfect. After your lower lungs feel full, allow your middle chest to fill with air, right around breast area. Once that is full continue to breathe into the top of your lungs. As you practice the motions will become more fluid. You’ll be able to see first your stomach rise, and then middle chest and finally upper chest like a wave.
As you breathe it is okay to add a little resistance to help further focus your mind. Practice this several times daily. With time it will become habit to breathe into your lower lungs, not only your chest. You’ll end up doing it while walking or sitting or standing. You will feel more energized as your whole body is getting enough oxygen. You will also feel less stressed and frantic.
Diaphragmatic breathing will help to slow a racing heart, help you turn off the “fight or flight” part of your autonomic nervous system and switch to “rest and digest” and thus waste less energy. Try deep or diaphragmatic breathing to better your health today.

Square Breathing

Square breathing is something that can further bring down one’s stress level. Diaphragmatic breathing is natural to everyone. Watch a baby, you’ll see their cute little bellies filling up first before their little chests rise at all. Square breathing uses deep or diaphragmatic breathing but sets it too a pattern that is not completely natural. Square breathing can be used just to relax or along with mediation. In fact this kind of structured breathing can be like meditation. This is toted in the alternative health care field examples are massage and acupuncture as a great stress reducer and a great tool to aid those practices in bettering your well being. This kind of breathing is great because you get enough oxygen to nourish your body and mind and you have to concentrate on something simple which can refocus a scattered and stressed mind. Because it does not come naturally we have to work at it and having to practice it helps our brain even more.

There are four steps, they are as follows:
· Breathe in through nose for four seconds
· Hold your breath for four seconds
· Slowly breathe out for four seconds
· Wait four seconds before breathing in again

Continue doing this for four minutes or longer if you seem to need it or want to do it. Please remember to count slowly, if you become light headed return to normal breathing until you feel normal and then start back up again. If you counting seem too fast slow it down.

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Going green around here

Posted on 28th September 2008 in Green/eco-friendly

So in an effort to do my part I have changed some very simple things around here. As not be wasteful and because I don’t have the money to just completely replace everything around here with green items, I’m still using some things that would not be considered good.
· One of the first things I did was get biodegradable dish soap. Having rather sensitive skin it was an easy switch for me. Really the price isn’t bad, dish soap lasts forever so it’s not a hit to my wallet. I’m using Seventh Generation dish soap now. I never use gloves so when I’m rinsing or just washing the big pots and pans by hand I noticed that my hands don’t dry out like they used to. Awesome!
· I also changed my laundry detergent to Free and Clear from Seventh Generation. It is specially designed to work with cold water which I use anyway to save on the electric bill. Very gentle, does not give me hives.
· For a general cleaner around the house I use my own little concoction of white vinegar mixed with water and a few drops of citronella essential oil to help with the vinegary smell. Really it seems to work better than the off brand pine sol that I was using.
· To clean the carpets I use warm water mixed with vinegar, a couple drops of dish soap with a tablespoon or so of borax. The vinegar seems to help it evaporate quicker so the carpet doesn’t stay damp as long.
· Apple cider vinegar poured on a rag and rubbed on the furries to help provide relief from fleas. The fleas are bad this year so it doesn’t get rid of all of them.
· Borax rubbed in the carpet to parch the fleas to death. Sounds awful I know.
· I hang most of my clothes up to dry so they don’t shrink and also to save use less electricity. Our dryer does not have a “no heat” setting and just running it would use electricity.
· Don’t use the air-dry option on the dishwasher. I tried turning it off at first, but there didn’t seem to be a difference. Now when the water drains I just turn the dial to stop and keep the door shut so they will dry from the heat in already in there.

It’s not a lot but it’s something. We also recycle, have a nice big recycling bin in our apartment. Use reusable shopping bags, which are awesome by the way.

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Busy, busy, busy

Posted on 27th September 2008 in Life

My business is picking up again! Yay! However, that means that I haven’t had the time to blog like I used to. My weekends are becoming the days I do everything else, blog, laundry, and fun shopping errands. Today I have to, no strike that, want to go baby clothes shopping for sister-in-law Jen. Their little Nicolas is going to pop out any day. I’m pretty excited for him to be born. Haven’t been around a little baby in years. Rick really hasn’t been around a baby at all.

I’ve been trying to decide if when I go shopping I’ll look for “green” and “eco” friendly exclusively. If it was my kid I’d want that, but I don’t want to make them feel badly for not getting it themselves or seem pretentious at all. Above all I don’t want them to feel badly for not having much money.
I do love shopping for baby clothes! It’s like dressing up a live doll. Everything is cute and little and just adorable. Especially boys’ clothes. If I had a boy I’d dress him in corduroy and earth tones. Frankly, I’d do that with a girl as well. No frills.
I’ve thought about getting them other supplies, bottles and such, but I have no idea what she or they are planning on doing for anything really. We’re not really close you know.

So back to my business, I’m busy, not to the point of not having any appointments or being booked out too far. I’m working to mentally work to not turn anyone away. It’s hard because sometimes I just want to be alone and not take care of anyone. Need to work on keeping myself separate. I’m too quick to take on other people’s struggles and secrets. I’ll get better at it. Give me time.

I have not been too busy to take pictures though. Rick and I have done some errands for his school supplies. Some of which brought us back up to Mount Vernon for an afternoon. We had some things to pick up from my Mom. So we went out to where she works. She works for one of her friends. They run a trucking business and have an awesome place. It’s just beautiful, has an old chicken barn that is falling apart. They have a horse and a cute garden. I love it. I want something like that someday. Need to actually save some money. Kind of hard because I love to shop.
Anyway, back to the picture taking. Rick took a bunch as well, pretty close ups and the ones of Coco the horse.

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My Saturday Update One

Posted on 27th September 2008 in Life

I live for the weekends, except when surrounded by a horrible mess. I don’t even know where to put it all. That’s my goal today; make our apartment more like a home. Then because it’s supposed to be a beautiful day, I’ll disappear for a short while then Rick can do some homework.

So about three weeks ago I decided that I wanted to trade for acupuncture again. The acupuncturist that visits and subs in our BNI group gave her commercial about people whom don’t sleep well, people whom dread sleep. According to her acupuncture can help. So now we are doing a trade. It’s awesome! I’ve had less than 10 nightmares in the last three weeks! I have a ton of energy now that I’m sleeping like a normal person.
I’ve been worrying over the last few years, especially since I started school two and a half years ago. I could barely hold it together. It only got worse. I can’t remember anything; I’m tired all the time. I worried that it would get worse, that I’d have to sleep 12 hours a day and would basically feel like an old woman all the time. It is so wrong feeling like an old person.
Well, if this is how I feel after three weeks, imagine what I’ll feel like in a month. Everything that I was thinking really wouldn’t work is now a possibility and I don’t think I’ll have to feel like a crazy woman while doing it. I’ll feel busy and tired after doing something, not before I’ve done anything.
I used to wonder about having kids. I love kids. Not sure if I want any. Before though, only three weeks ago I used to think I wouldn’t be able to handle it. Mothers are sleep deprived at best, walking zombies at worst. I always thought, to myself of course, that they were complaining about silly things. Not that I’m any better but I’ve been dealing with sleep deprivation for 24 years not 24 months. Not to bring down what parents feel or deal with at all. I think now that I’m sleeping a bit better than I could handle being waken up by a cooing and then screaming baby. Could totally handle it, maybe even enjoy it. Though of course I won’t, we won’t have any munchkins unless we are definitely ready. If we ever are.
Anyway, I’ll also be able to restart my business when we move and not be an anxious. I’m excited. Now before this starts getting too much more sappy.

I’ve got goals, oh yes I do. I’m going to hang our print trays. Organize one of our closets. Oh yes I have the energy to win the clutter war!

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I fell in love with a four-legged man

Posted on 25th September 2008 in Life, Pets

Yes, he is a horse. He’s beautiful. I first met him a few years ago. My brother’s friend Treavor gave him a home. I’ve ridden him once, a long time ago when he first came here. He reminded me so much of my first love Pretzel. He is the stocky kind of Quarter horse, chestnut, though not nearly as deep a red as Pretzel was. He like Pretzel has a hole in his head. Pretzel had one, a rather large dent, in the middle of his eyes. It was from an accident during a thunderstorm. That story is for another post. Coco, that’s this guy’s name, is missing an eye, so he has an eyehole socket. But it doesn’t make him look grotesque, rather it gives him character, makes him better. He really is a handsome horse. He’s pretty tall at least 16 hands, maybe even 17. I told my mom he makes me feel short. Pretzel didn’t make me feel short and he was right around 15 hands.
Coco, is stubborn, full of attitude and wants something from you. He wants to do his own thing, go his own speed as I found out the day I rode him. It was okay though. I loved feeling that power underneath me. I loved how he challenged me in everything I did. He feels like a younger version of Pretzel whom was 24 when he came to be with me. Coco is between 13 and 15 we think.
Now he’s a few years older and lonely. Ian’s friend is away at college. Some children feed him and pet him. Mom thinks he misses people. I want to be that person. I can’t go up there often. I don’t think I would, but I don’t want to overstep my bounds and offend them by “adopting” him. I want to pull out my old tack and brushes, though I’m not sure what is left anymore. It was all so painful to deal with after Pretzel died.
I was stroking his cheek and watched the dirt float away in the breeze. Of course mentally planning stowing away a few dollars here and there and getting a curry and a brush and a pick. Wondering to myself, “Can I trim his feet? I think Treavor does, he could teach me.” I love the way he smelled. Want to walk the pasture to find all the holes so I can ride him safely and not get pitched off. Shop for an English saddle, used to replace the one I had.
I miss my horsy days. I want to get my fingernails dirty with horse dirt. I want to brush Coco until he shines, comb or clip his mane. I want to be his companion. I’ve heard people talk about how having pets isn’t right. You shouldn’t lord over an animal. Let them be. Well, we have created these animals and have a duty to care for them. Horses and dogs and cats, you don’t lord over them. You have a relationship with them. If they are pack animals you become part of their mini pack. Pretzel and I had a great companionship. He enjoyed being around me, and I loved him more than I’ve loved most people. I miss that. I miss feeling my spirit commune with another different spirit. I know, sounding like a ridiculous hippy. It not that the name of my blog? I want Coco to want me, to butt me in the back (hopefully gently) for a neck rub. I want my days with my first love back. Just to be girl and horse for a while.

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I must be a gypsy

Posted on 21st September 2008 in Life, Travel

I’ve wanted to travel for years. I did some traveling four or five years ago. I’ve had a couple of road trips up and down the coast. Nothing overly exciting. I did go to Hawaii by myself as no one else could go with me. Four months later I went to Mexico with my mother. Both trips where awesome!
Since then I got married and went to school. Now Rick is going to school. Priorities you know. Planning on getting back to some traveling when he’s out. Rick has never been to Canada. We both want to go to Alaska. I want to go to Europe. It will become a priority someday soon! For now I just enjoy moving to new places about every two years or so, about the time we get tired of it. I want to be a world gypsy though.


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Religion seems to be the “great divider”.

Posted on 20th September 2008 in Opinions

I personally no longer prescribe to a religion. Many years ago I quietly called myself a Christian. Quietly because I knew Christians had a bad reputation and I was not like most of them. I didn’t judge people or refuse to accept them for who they were. Through those years I had questions that no one could answer for me. I wouldn’t consider myself a feminist either because they have the reputation of putting men down, that men are horrible. I know that not all of them are. However, if you must, call me a feminist as I believe that everyone, men and women and those in between should be equally respected and appreciated for what they can do and bring to the world.
I noticed as a child hearing stories from the Bible that women were not equal. There were clearly defined roles and to go beyond those roles was sin or evil. “Well that’s strange,” I’d think. I’d ask my mother or my father if that applied to me. I didn’t want to be told that I had to cook and clean and wash my husbands feet. That’s not equality. The best thing either of them told me was the Old Testament is over ridden by the New, however that book still seems to show some roles. I’d see that the Old Testament was cruel, but the New spoke of love, like a reserved version of the 60’s. God is love in the New Testament, in the Old He is jealous and kills people if they do not follow him. It was even said that the sons suffer the sins of the father. How is that fair or right? It isn’t a baby’s fault that his father or mother killed someone or worships someone else’s god.
My parents also instilled in me a great freedom. They said that they believed in the Bible, that Jesus was God’s Son and so forth. They said that I would have to make my own choices. Their choices in faith could not be my own. Well, after years in struggling to free my thoughts from the traditional belief in God and Jesus I’d say I’ve come quit a ways. I’m sick of religion. I’m sick of hearing that if I don’t go to a Lutheran church I’m going to hell. Or if I don’t confess my sins I’m going to hell. Or if I don’t follow the right religion then I’m doomed to burn in hell, surrounded by fire and brimstone. What’s with Hell? Who is right? I’m not going to base my life on something written by a sexist asshole whom probably broke all those rules he laboriously write out on parchment. Maybe he didn’t though, maybe he is the only person ever to not break one commandment, never to kill or covet or be jealous.

I ran across a blog written about the duplicity and almost dangerousness of the Bible if taken literally. The End of Christianity. It asks some questions and quotes scripture from Deuteronomy. I’ve read it and it is very accurate. Reading through it brought back the same questions that went unanswered for years. I feel better about it now as far as I go. Other people, that’s who I worry about, the people whom take it too seriously. This verse is not supposed to be taken literally: Deuteronomy 22 is quoted as saying, “A woman must not wear men’s clothing, nor a man wear women’s clothing, for the LORD your God detests anyone who does this.” So we aren’t allowed to wear pants and I’m sinning when I wear men’s converse tennis shoes. This is not something in which I want to participate. Also, in googling that sentence I came across a couple of links talking about it. It seemed to be that one should not live as a transvestite, which was a practice by one opposing people, the Canaanites. Should Christian Women Wear Pants That brings up another issue, homosexuality and other alternative lifestyles. I will not support the idea that they are sinners and must change everything about their lifestyle to live “holy, God pleasing” lives. This issue was pinnacle in my rejecting that religion. Religion is one of the last ways in the western world for people to be bigoted and hateful and get away with it, without many consequences. People, seriously, quit hiding behind your idea of god and get over your fears and let your thinking evolve.

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Angry garbage

Posted on 19th September 2008 in Life

After the moment of angry is gone I feel exhausted. Not angry anymore but shocked and disappointed and the last bit of pity gone. It amazes me how much people think that they can do anything to anyone and not have consequences. The delusion of it all. The separation that is causes, the actions, the reactions and garbage that it leaves. All I can do is shake my head. This chaos isn’t beautiful, it’s hurtful. Don’t touch me with it, don’t pull me in.

Enough drama, aren’t we too old for this? I think so.

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Gold panning

Posted on 18th September 2008 in Life, Nature

I went up to my parent’s house to hang out and pick up my mom’s sewing machine and surger (sorry not sure how to spell it). It was pretty relaxing. Nice day, very sunny, I had cute clothes and watched my dad pick apples. I tried to help, but I am horribly afraid of spiders. I used to be able to pick apples pretty well. I’d inspect the apples, palm and twist and hope for now huge spider. Though usually there is a web. It seemed like when I was out there with him that there were more spiders than I ever remembered. They were huge. I forgot how huge spiders got out on a farm. And the assholes blend so well with their surroundings, making my life more difficult. Really I don’t think I picked more than maybe three, two of which I knocked off the tree with my finger.
I was thinking. I miss the open air, the clean air, but am I really ready to go back to it? I’m not happy where I am now. I want open space, but I forgot about the little things, small details of everyday life at my family’s home. Like spiders.
No, I think it will be worth it. The Asian pears from the store are not as sweet as those off a tree in a huge backyard. They don’t have the same bright yellow glow. They might be smaller but what they lack in size they more than make up for in flavor and juices. “Chin dripplers” that is what my dad calls them.

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Dad has a recent new hobby. He’s been talking for years about starting it. He’d get that bright smile and childish squirminess when he’d talk about it, like he does with all his hobbies. Gold panning. What? You must be kidding; old grey haired men with beards did that in the 1800’s. People killed each other over gold in the Gold Rush. Yes that’s true. It is also true that my dad has always had a taste for the strange, out of general hobbies. And he happens to be one of those grey haired older dudes with a beard, though his is much more trim and when he works he wears a tye, untied but he wears it anyway. Said that no tying it was his way of rebelling. I heard, “It’s my way of not growing up or giving into the man.” That’s my dad the rebel.
Anyway, he set up a “gold panning station” in their yard by the old ’66 Ford truck, the one I love. It’s really very beautiful, yellow, though now covered in some strange green stuff, can’t remember what it’s called.
He has extraordinary patience for it. I watched for a few minutes as he moved sand water and tiny flecks of gold around in a plastic gold pan. Yes, modern days have given gold panners plastic things to use, must warmer than a metal pan. I was bored in less than two minutes. Of course I’m not a panner, and have no desire to be. But it was important to my daddy so I watched. I don’t get to spend a lot of time with him, so when I do get to see him I try really hard to pay attention even if it is a subject that I really don’t care about. Now, I certainly wouldn’t mind going with him to whatever river he visits for his black sand, I’d get great pictures and totally relax, read if I wanted. Yes, I’ll have to tag along one time if our schedules align.
Anyway, he did find a garnet or ruby, tiny little thing, which I thought was awesome. I never considered that one would find gems in a river.
Though I have no desire and was bored watching water spin around in a glorified plastic lid I could see how the simple delicate movements and watching closely for the gold to separate from the sand would be relaxing. And challenging. I had an idea, thought the black sand was beautiful, might as him for it when he’s done sifting through everything for an art project.

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That’s how I spent a week day afternoon. Taking pictures of everything I found beautiful to capture images in time so that I have an image to stimulate a memory or creativity. Spent it with my parents, realized how far I’ve come from that silly little 18 year old that left home determined to live away from everything she knew. I did, tried so hard to get away. I’m done running away. See it differently now, see the simple or even complex beauty in an open bare field or a rusty can or a grey haired man panning for gold with a turquoise gold pan.

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SVC has part of my heart

Posted on 18th September 2008 in Life

Rick starts school on Monday! He’s so excited and so am I! In just a few months he’ll be done and we should be moving! Its interesting, different being on the other side of a relationship where one of the couple is going to school. It was me last time. Since it’s not me this time I’m not as worried. Rick is brilliant, really his memory is amazing and he never really has to study. He doesn’t obsess about things. I did, studied more than I needed to.
This isn’t about me though. It will be nice stepping into the background, take some of the pressure off me. I get to spoil and help him. He’s nervous about working and going to school. He will of course be okay.

We went up to Skagit today to get his books. I love that campus. It has changed so much, it doesn’t scare me quite as much as it used to. I don’t feel so young and naïve. They’ve added a couple of new buildings, an event center which is beautiful and huge! Another building that’s purpose I have yet to hear about. They rebuilt the main office administration building. It looks awesome, way less ghetto. The book store is in the main building now as well.
Walking into the Cardinal bookstore brought back memories. The last time I was in that one I was 16 I think. It smelled the same, new supplies some used books and paper and pens. Such a wonderful smell. There was a half wall of backpacks! They were awesome! Of course there were the standard ones, black or grey with lots of pockets. Some of them had cool prints on them. I wanted to be in school again just so I could have a cool backpack like one of those.

It’s almost too bad that we don’t live near and he couldn’t go to the school. He wouldn’t but still between classes I could have lunch with him, take a walk around campus. The valley in general is a wonderful place for walks.

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